okay um i haven't been in this situation yet
 	
 	
 		
 
 	
 	
 		you know my my parents are not quite at that age yet so i haven't
 	
 	
 		that's not quite elderly huh
 	
 	
 		no so i haven't uh really been in that situation although they are thinking about my grandmother but um
 	
 	
 		
 
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		that's really about it how about you have you been in that situation where you've had to
 	
 	
 		um not for my parents but i i was around uh two sets of grandparents
 		um quite a bit we we put one i put one grandfather in a rest home
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		and
 		that killed him  well yeah kind of well there was some other things involved but it before he was really active and
 	
 	
 		did it really
 	
 	
 		the there was some you know he lost lost his drivers license and uh couldn't get around and wasn't able to do some things and so we ended up just having to put him in a rest home
 	
 	
 		yeah
 	
 	
 		and he just kind of became a vegetable and died
 	
 	
 		oh no that's sad
 	
 	
 		so but that was a long time ago that was uh back in like seventy three
 	
 	
 		yeah
 		oh okay
 	
 	
 		so um i think the way they did things were a lot different back then
 	
 	
 		are sure they were
 	
 	
 		and uh
 		my grandmother his his wife uh we also put her in a rest home she was in a rest home and then she was back out because she didn't really need to be there
 	
 	
 		yeah
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		and uh had a physical had a good physical therapist at that place
 	
 	
 		oh
 	
 	
 		and they worked with her and
 		got her walking and got her taking kind of taking care of herself and so she was able to come back home
 	
 	
 		yeah
 		oh
 	
 	
 		and then she had to go back in a couple of times
 		but mostly it was just because she kind of gave up
 	
 	
 		huh
 	
 	
 		and they got her going again
 	
 	
 		yeah
 	
 	
 		so i guess as far as looking and i said the as what you're looking for i think you need to look for an active
 		uh
 		interactive staff
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		somebody who's willing to work with uh you know work with a patients and do do things with them and treat them treat them like that
 	
 	
 		yeah
 		and i'm sure it's it's expensive
 	
 	
 		it it is
 	
 	
 		yeah
 		
 
 		yeah
 	
 	
 		it is expensive
 	
 	
 		yeah my my grandmother is not in a nursing home but she's in a  oh they're like um they're apartments for senior citizens
 	
 	
 		what
 		uh-huh
 		oh uh-huh
 	
 	
 		and she loves that because it it they arrange activities for them all day long and then they have um where the bus picks them up and takes them where they need to go
 	
 	
 		um-hum
 	
 	
 		and she she she really does love that but she's just concerned about
 		in
 		in the future you know she she knows it's not gonna be like that all the time and she's just wondering well what's gonna happen to me and and i you know it's i guess it's so normal to start to wonder about that even if she doesn't need that but
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 		when she can't take care of herself
 		um-hum now that
 	
 	
 		you know she's kind of asking questions about what well what's gonna happen you know this can't last forever and
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		so
 	
 	
 		does she have a is it like a kitchenette type apartment where she can fix her own food if she wants to or she can go down to the cafeteria
 	
 	
 		yeah it
 		yeah she can but i i think it is also cafeteria style because i i really i i i doubt if she rarely cooks for herself
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		so uh
 	
 	
 		fact i
 	
 	
 		because i i remember her in her letters telling me she she'll go downstairs for coffee or something to eat so i'm assuming it's something like that too so
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		so
 	
 	
 		yeah i i really like that concept they've they have a few of those well quite a few of those places like that here in Utah and uh you know i
 	
 	
 		um-hum
 	
 	
 		couples can you know husband and wife can can live there too or or whatever i and and and then and yet they have their their friendships and relationships the
 		you know of getting together and eating together and all of that
 	
 	
 		yeah yeah
 	
 	
 		i i think it really takes um
 		you you know looking more at the people than even really the facilities
 	
 	
 		um-hum and she lives by herself too she seems to like it and um my husband's grandmother is
 	
 	
 		uh-huh
 	
 	
 		well she lives she lives in a house on her own and she doesn't really need the care or anything like that but she has her own home and she and she's doing really well i'm really proud of her she's doing really well
 	
 	
 		um-hum
 	
 	
 		so
 		we haven't had to do anything but then again she has a lot of support so i mean she's got her mother in town too and things like that so hopefully we won't need to go that route
 	
 	
 		yeah
 		yeah
 		well i i think that that's the thing that's a little bit scary you know a little bit tough about putting them in a rest home is it's it's almost like that you know they say putting them out to pasture
 		and some some of the people that were there with my grandmother were really active they they wanted to do things they didn't you know they didn't wanna go down and play bingo or um
 	
 	
 		yeah
 	
 	
 		you know play with the yarn