Economist , Jan. 31 (posted Saturday, Jan. 31) Clinton should resign if there is even a "shred of truth" in the Lewinsky story, argues a forceful cover editorial. Regardless of whether he committed any criminal act, Clinton should quit if he had sex with Lewinsky and lied to America about it: "It would confirm a clear pattern of Clintonite behavior, one of reckless risk-taking followed by deceit. ... That is unworthy of a president." ... A profile of Dan Quayle hints that he could be Jimmy Carter to Clinton's Nixon. If he sustains his righteous, conservative image, he'll fare well in the 2000 presidential race. Problem: He's still a dull speaker and mediocre thinker. ... An article claims that once-secular Iraq is embracing Islam. Saddam Hussein is building the world's largest mosque in order to improve his reputation in the Islamic world. His subjects are returning to Islam because it's their only relief from poverty, hunger, and unemployment. New Republic , Feb. 16 (posted Friday, Jan. 30) Seven stories on Lewinsky. One predicts that Democrats will try to dump Clinton quickly if the allegations turn out to be true: They don't want him dragging the party down to defeat in 1998 or 2000 as Nixon did the Republicans in 1974. Republicans will be happy to let Clinton cook slowly. The "TRB" column says the essential difference between Watergate and Clinterngate is that while Clinton may be personally slimy, his entire presidency is not founded on corruption and deception. A piece condemns Hillary Clinton for standing by her man. A supposedly ardent feminist, she has smeared the reputations of Clinton's female accusers in order to protect her political power. ... The editorial endorses a "just war" against Iraq but worries that Clinton is too tarnished to lead it. Esquire , February 1998 (posted Thursday, Jan. 29) The cover story: a look at O.J.'s life, post-trial. Simpson plays golf six days a week, chats amiably with gawking tourists outside his house, and thinks he'll be a star again. The writer's conclusion: O.J. himself no longer knows if he's guilty. The piece is the source of the startling, much-repeated O.J. quote: "Let's say I committed this crime. Even if I did do this, it would have to have been because I loved her very much, right?" ... A story reports from a dwarf convention that is the main courting ground for little people. Dwarf guys complain that some dwarf women won't date anyone under 4 feet tall. Fact: Dwarfs socially stratify each other based on extent of deformity--achondroplastic dwarfs (more proportional, with nondeformed faces) rule the roost. ... Esquire profiles a Utah man with four wives and 31 children. He's not in it for the sex (which is solely for procreation), he owes on four mortgages, he's wanted by the law for bigamy (quadragamy?), and he must remember eight birthdays and two wedding anniversaries in a single month. Why does he do it? It's his duty to God. The Mormon Church, which has outlawed polygamy, excommunicated him. New York Times Magazine , Feb. 1 (posted Thursday, Jan. 29) Hong Kongers are increasingly restless about Chinese rule. As the economic crisis rattles the former colony, its residents want a larger voice in running it. The worry: Hong Kong could become like its Chinese sister city Shenzhen, which is capitalist but wild, lawless, and cruel to workers. ... A piece describes the burgeoning market for Cuban girls: Beautiful young girls throw themselves at tourists in hopes of becoming kept mistresses. A few American men have actually moved to Cuba to get married. ... The cover story lionizes Chuck Close, who manages to paint astonishing Pointillist portraits despite near-total paralysis. His work is described as "Friendly Art," a backlash against modern art's harshness. Conclusion: He deserves the $400,000 he gets for each painting because he's such a good guy. Time and Newsweek , Feb. 2 (posted Tuesday, Jan. 27) Time has the better cover shot: Lewinsky, wearing a dashing DKNY beret, standing next to the president. But Newsweek 's coverage trumps Time 's. It publishes an exhaustive account of the story to date. Its package includes a long, exclusive excerpt from the Tripp tapes and an essay by George Stephanopoulos. The once-loyal Clintonite distances himself from the president: "Right now, I don't know whether to be sad, angry, or both. But if the Lewinsky charges are valid, I know this: I'm livid." Newsweek also explains its decision to hold Michael Isikoff's story last week. Primary reason: The tape Newsweek heard did not confirm or disprove the obstruction-of-justice allegation. Time counters with an evolutionary psychologist's take on Clinton's zipper problem and a defense of Matt Drudge, who first leaked the story. (Full disclosure: Slate editor Michael Kinsley wrote the Drudge defense.) Time 's main article emphasizes Hillary's role in the White House reaction: While Bill crashed on a couch, she went into overdrive. In both magazines: an examination of Kenneth Starr's legal case, a map of the White House diagraming what (allegedly) happened where, a profile of Lewinsky, a profile of Vernon Jordan, and an armchair analysis of Clinton's apparent sex compulsion. U.S. News & World Report , Feb. 2 (posted Tuesday, Jan. 27) U.S. News finishes a distant third: Its Monica coverage lacks diagrams, legal analysis, and juicy tidbits. The cover image--the president superimposed on a shadowy photo of Lewinsky--is wan. An essay says Washington is blowing the scandal out of proportion, and an article wonders how Hillary endures her husband's infidelity. (The theory: "Even if Clinton is unfaithful, his wife considers those who would use that to ruin his political career as the really bad guys. Not her Bill.") ... An article claims that Medicare fraud artists, including Russian crooks, bilk the government of billions of dollars per year. Phony clinics and labs file false bills, and the system is so big that no one notices. ... A survey on mutual funds warns that Fidelity, once a powerhouse, is now merely average. The survey also advises investors to consider moving money from stocks to bonds. The New Yorker , Feb. 2 (posted Tuesday, Jan. 27) In Monica news: 1) A profile of Tripp ally/book agent Lucianne Goldberg describes her as adventurous, aggressive, and rather amoral--a "seasoned Bond girl." Why did Goldberg get involved? "Because it's fucking fascinating. I love dish!" She denies a rumor that she had an affair with Lyndon Johnson. 2) A piece claims that the president is the real victim of the scandal. He may lose his job, reputation, and wife; the star-gazing Lewinsky, by contrast, found fame and power. 3) In the "we never thought we'd read that in The New Yorker " category, a story wonders whether Clinton will be remembered as the " 'pussy President.' " ... A long piece about fat condemns virtually all popular diets (especially the high protein, low carb ones). Weight depends more on genes and a chemical called leptin than on food intake. Good news for the obese: Scientists believe they are close to understanding and controlling leptin. ... Also, the magazine prints eight of Ted Hughes' much-discussed new poems about Sylvia Plath. Weekly Standard , Feb. 2 (posted Tuesday, Jan. 27) The general theme of Monica coverage: Clinton's presidency is over. The editorial argues that Clinton has forfeited the second chance America gave him in 1992. He's now proved himself "pathological," "unbalanced," and "compulsive." He has a "character of infinite deception and self-deception." A piece urges Republicans to use this time of Clinton paralysis to push through their agenda, especially a ban on partial-birth abortions and a tax cut. An article says the Lewinsky case will scare "many potential John Deans" into coming forward and revealing more Clintonian crimes. ... The Standard warns that Saddam Hussein is going to win the current standoff with the United States: Even if we launch airstrikes, he will preserve his chemical weapons and his hold on power. The only satisfactory option: A ground invasion that deposes/kills him. --Seth Stevenson