Nuttiness
[Editor's note: The
first two articles listed here are factual and correctly quoted. The others are
not.]
Sept. 3,
1998
Washington Post
Headline: "Airlines May Have to Bag the Peanuts"
The
Transportation Department has informed airlines that under new disability
rules, it must provide "peanut-free buffer zones"--defined as at least three
rows--for any passenger who declares in advance a medically documented severe
allergy to peanuts.
Sept. 23,
1998
New
York Times
Headline:
"Growing Number of Schools Ban Peanut Butter as Allergy Threat"
Prodded
by parents warning of lethal allergies, by the contentions of some researchers
that peanut allergies are on the rise and, not least, by a fear of litigation,
growing numbers of public and private schools across the country, including
many of New York City's most selective independent schools, have banned peanut
butter from their cafeterias. Others have declared peanut-free zones or set up
committees to figure out what to do.
Oct. 10,
1998
Washington Post
Headline: "Congress Declares Capitol Peanut-Free Zone"
Citing
complaints by allergy-prone legislators and aides, Congress today banned
peanuts and peanut products from the U.S. Capitol and adjacent federal
buildings. The bipartisan resolution passed the House on a vote of 429-3 and
was approved by voice vote in the Senate. U.S. Capitol police distributed
epinephrine syringes throughout the building to protect members of Congress and
their staffs against peanut allergy symptoms such as throat constriction and
rapid loss of blood pressure.
Oct. 15,
1998
Los
Angeles Times
Headline:
"Chinese Restaurants Declare Peanut Sauce 'Peanut-Free' "
Prompted by widespread concern over peanut-related health risks, the Chinese
Restaurant Association of America banned peanuts and peanut oil from all
"peanut sauce" served in accredited Chinese restaurants. Restaurants may
continue to serve "peanut sauce" in dishes such as Kung Pao Chicken, but that
sauce may no longer contain actual peanuts. Restaurant owners who had opposed
the ban agreed to support it and to accept random enforcement inspections in
exchange for the right to retain the phrase "peanut sauce" in carryout
menus.
Oct. 18,
1998
New
York Times
Headline: "Peanuts Killed Our Children"
Support groups have sprouted up across America for those whose lives have
been shattered by peanuts and peanut-based foods. "This is a place for families
to come together and share their grief," said Douglas French, founder of PNUTTS
(People Newly United Through Their Peanut-Related Stress). "Peanuts stole away
their sons and daughters, their mothers and fathers. These people never had a
voice. ... Now they can tell their stories without shame or ridicule."
Oct. 20,
1998
Boston
Globe Editorial Page
Headline:
"The Peanut Menace"
Gone
are the days of innocently cracking salted shells at the ballpark or spreading
a thick "p.b.&j." at a family picnic. Civic leaders have at last confronted
the truth: Peanuts are a menace to the American way of life. Congress should
move immediately to prohibit the cultivation, sale, and use of peanuts and
their byproducts.
Oct. 23,
1998
Washington Post
Headline: "GOP Declares 'War on Peanuts' "
Republican congressional leaders today outlined a plan to eradicate American
peanut abuse by the end of the century. Responding to a proposal backed by
House Democrats, under which government-funded clinics would distribute cashews
to peanut abusers on a transitional basis, Republican leaders in both houses
demanded an aggressive interdiction program to "fight peanuts at their source."
Preliminary plans drafted by Senate aides involve napalm strikes in Georgia and
South Carolina by U.S. Army special forces. "These peanut-growing bandits are
going to face the hellfire of their darkest, peanut-fueled nightmares,"
declared Sen. Jesse Helms, R-N.C.
Oct. 24,
1998
New
York Times
Headline:
"In Shift, President Vests Powers in 'Czar' "
Senior
administration officials said last night that the White House will appoint a
"Peanut Czar" to oversee the president's campaign against peanut production and
consumption. Aides commended the decision and cited progress on several fronts.
In recent days, the long-running syndicated comic strip Peanuts has been
pulled from hundreds of newspapers, famed peanut advocate George Washington
Carver has been demoted from "historic figure" to "anti-American hatemonger,"
and the former president and peanut farmer Jimmy Carter has been stripped of
his American citizenship. Said a stoic Carter, "It was only a matter of
time."
