Many Slate readers
have expressed regret that Prudence has abandoned her advice column in favor of
her needlework. Sensitive to the continuing need for guidance among
Slate readers, however, Prudence has prevailed upon her niece and
namesake, Prudence, to assume the responsibility. In coming weeks, Prudie (as
she is known to friends) will begin to respond to some of the unanswered
e-mails that have piled up in her aunt's queue as well as to new inquiries that
readers may submit. Like her aunt, Prudie will be drawing upon her rich
experience of life in responding to questions about manners, personal
relations, politics, and other subjects. Unlike her aunt, she does not do
macroeconomics--though, in the family tradition, she does do
needlepoint.
As
before, you should send your questions for publication to [email protected]. Queries
should not exceed 200 words. Please indicate how you wish your letter to be
signed, preferably including your location.
Dear
Prudence,
One of
my favorite aunts proposed to visit the White House along with two young nieces
when they vacation in Washington this spring. Ordinarily, I wouldn't give this
matter further thought, but since I've read so much about scandalous behavior
in the Oval Office, I think maybe they should skip the White House and spend
more time in the Capitol instead. Mostly I am concerned that my nieces'
reputations will suffer when they return home to the inevitable questions from
curious friends. Please help me: White House or no White House?
--Uncle
Cautious
Dear
Unc,
Oh, by all
means, White House. Prudie feels certain that young tourists are safe from the
alleged scandalous behavior. You do not say how old your nieces are, so just a
small caveat: If they are in the intern age bracket, simply advise them that
the room off the Oval Office is not on the tour.
--Prudie,
prophylactically
Dear
Prudence,
I
couldn't wait to get e-mail at my office, because I hate returning phone calls.
Now I find I hate returning e-mails. What do I do? And what's the proper
etiquette for an e-mail kiss-off? How long can I keep saying, "Oh, I didn't get
it. Can you resend?"
Sincerely,--Anxious in
Austin
Dear
Anxious,
You have definitely
identified a problem for the '90s. I don't think an etiquette has yet been
formulated for this problem, so here are two jerry-built options: 1) Ignore
things you wish to ignore, or 2) fluff off troublesome e's with a brief
reply. Something like "in haste" or "gotta run, but I got your message."
And, dare
Prudie say this in an online magazine? You can always say that your server
screwed up ... sort of the electronic version of "the dog ate my homework."
--Prudie, briskly
Dear
Prudence,
With
winter comes a most embarrassing problem--incredible static cling. Static
electricity, which not only turns A-line skirts into minis, but also affects
hair and body, resulting in hair that stands out unattractively, and makes
sparks fly whenever my body touches another. What can one do?
--Clung to in
California
Dear
Clung,
Write to
Heloise. Prudie hasn't the faintest idea how to solve this dilemma. However I
do remember that a few nights ago at a party, a woman confided that her dress
was clingy and electric, so she wore a light flannel nightgown underneath. She
went on to say that this approach had the added benefit that should someone ask
her to spend the night, she would be prepared.
--Prudie, statically
Dear
Prudence,
My
boyfriend wears totally unsexy underwear--plain white briefs that are too big
for him and bag in the back. I've tried giving him subtle hints like "I think
boxers are sexy" and "boxers really turn me on," but they just seem to go over
his head. I even bought him a pair of boxers, but he just wears them to sleep
in--with his yucky briefs underneath. What can I do?
--Turned off in
Kansas
Dear
Turned,
He wears
the baggy briefs underneath ? I offer you two suggestions. Since things
are going over his head, try under his nose. Write him a short love note saying
it would mean a lot to you if he--forgive the pun--bagged his lucky underpants
and only wore boxers. Alas, the alternative is to forget it. Would you think
Prudie salacious if she were to suggest that it's what's inside the briefs or
boxers that counts?
--Prudie, briefly
Dear
Prudence,
In the
initial stages of dating, it is usual to assume that both parties are probably
dating others. I prefer to describe my other dates as "having plans." I also
take pains so that the people I date remain clueless about others I may be
dating. One of the men I am currently seeing has asked me to dinner at a
particular restaurant that he's been eager to try. I accepted, but when I
looked up the address, I found it was located in the same (very small) building
as the office of another man I am seeing. I am on the verge of suggesting
another restaurant, lest I "collide" with the other man. Should I change the
venue?
--Dating in
D.C.
Dear
Date,
Prudie
thinks it would be wonderful to be seen by another swain and cannot
imagine why you would want to pretend to be otherwise dateless in what you
describe as "the initial stages of dating" this new person.
--Prudie,
strategically
A Postscript From
Prudie
Dear
Readers,
I am honored that my dear
Aunt Prudence has entrusted me to continue her service to the lorn of all
stripes. I feel as though I am stepping into the family business, as it
were.
Happily,
I have no feeling that I am trying to fill her shoes. (Truth to tell, Auntie
wears a rather large size.) Being of a younger generation, I may be a little
less delicate in my approach but I hope of no less use to you.
Yours,--Prudie
