Drawing upon her rich
experience of life, Prudence (Prudie to her friends) responds to questions
about manners, personal relations, politics, and other subjects. Please send
your questions for publication to [email protected]. Queries should not exceed 200 words in
length. Please indicate how you wish your letter to be signed, preferably
including your location.
Dear
Prudence,
The
Harris book ( The Nurture Assumption: Why Children Turn Out the Way They
Do , by Judith Rich Harris) suggests that parents contribute nothing to the
development of their children. What do you think?
--Minnesota
Contingent
Dear
Minn,
Prudie has only dragonfly
knowledge of this book. That is, she has skimmed the surface by reading a few
reviews. The title suggests the author is a childless geneticist. The research,
however, is data-driven and well-supported. Though controversial, the theory
that genes and peers play pivotal roles in development cannot be dismissed.
While
genetic makeup and peer influence can override some elements of the home
environment, parental attention, input, and example cannot be written off.
Prudie hopes the Harris book will not encourage parents everywhere to leave
their child-rearing duties to the neighbor kids and DNA.
--Prudie,
developmentally
Dear
Prudie,
My wife and I recently had
our second child, a boy. We have a problem concerning gift etiquette. We
received a beautiful blanket from some out-of-town friends whom we see about
once a year. The blanket has inscribed on it--in large letters--the baby's name
and date of birth. The problem is that he was born one week earlier than the
blanket says.
We can't decide whether to
tell our friends about the error. If it was the store's mistake, I'm sure they
would want to correct the error. However, if it was the friends' mistake, we
have no desire to embarrass them with their error. (Actually, being exactly one
week later, the blanket does commemorate his bris.)
What to
do?
--Sincerely,Gifted and
Grateful
Dear
Gift,
Mazel tov! Prudie
suggests you be the first on your block to start the craze of bris blankets.
You are correct not to want to embarrass the gift givers, and it's a major pain
to deal with stores about replacing customized merchandise. (And luckily, the
kid can't read yet.)
Like
misprinted stamps that become valuable because they are mistakes, the
beautiful blanket will have a little extra meaning--plus nice memories--because
of the erroneous date.
--Prudie, snugly
Dear
Prudence,
My hubby just went to
have his head stuffed. The nine point buck he got with a bow, that is. We live
in a tiny cabin, and friends are asking where he is going to hang it. "Above
the bed" seems to be their general consensus. To this, proud Hubby replies, "IN
the bed."
1) What would Freud
reply?
2) What do you
think?
Personally, while I'm glad Hubby is happy, I don't want this dead thing
coming between us.
--JEB in Pa.
Dear
JEB,
How exciting that Hubby shot
a hatrack, I mean, buck, with a bow. I think he is funning with you, as the
Southerners say, when he tells friends the trophy will reside in the bed with
the two of you. That, or he has mafia fantasies and is trying to tell you
something.
As for
Freud's reply, he is not taking any calls. My own thoughts you already know:
Hubby is kidding, and the joke shows pride in his accomplishment. And Prudie
thinks, especially in a tiny cabin, that the antlers would provide a wonderful
place on which to hang hats and coats.
--Prudie, practically
Dear
Prudie,
I am so
disappointed you felt it necessary to opine on this matter. (The matter being
the letter from Truthful in Torrance re the president's behavior.) Not only did I
think your answer glib, but given the attention this matter has received vs.
that which is warranted, it was also unnecessary.
Warmest
regards,--Richard
Dear
Rich,
Do you
know what Prudie finds wonderful? That you disagree with her yet sign your note
"Warmest regards." Civility reigns.
--Prudie, warmly
