No. 334: "Paige Proofs"
Fill in the blank
as Rev. Paige Patterson, president of the Southern Baptist Convention, responds
to critics: "Show me a single case where a Southern Baptist has ____________,
and I will do my best to see it never happens again."
Send
your answer by noon ET Wednesday to [email protected] .
Monday's Question (No.
333)--"In No Sense":
Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville, Tenn., has announced the March
release of a book with the working title The Death of Innocence . Name
the author and subject. ( Question courtesy of Jon
Delfin. )
"Dinesh D'Souza, about how everything went to hell after racism
ended."-- Matt Sullivan
"Barry
Scheck and Peter Neufeld on the 'new new science of DNA.' "-- David
Feige
"It's
by that girl with leukemia who the Backstreet Boys wouldn't visit."-- Mark
Greenberg
"It's
those 'Bible Codes' guys again! They've found the names of
13 th -century rabbis in the Denny's menu."-- Al Petrosky
"Well,
it's about time Edith Wharton finished that sequel."-- Chris Hammett
Click
for more answers.
Randy's Wrap-Up
Sadly, all 32 major TV
networks rejected my pitch for America Loses Its Innocence Again for the
Very First Time , the story of a surprisingly corrupt game-show contestant
(whose suburban life is not nearly as sans souci as the brochure would
have you believe) who is exiled from his own personal Eden when 60
Minutes refuses to broadcast an interview that proves--proves!--that the
president lied to the entire country about this minister (a man of God!) who
turns out to have had sex with a dog, like maybe a golden retriever (unless
things turn around and I get to do it at Fox in which case the dog will be a
chimp, but that makes sense dramatically) who can't keep a secret (see, it's a
talking dog), but it takes this big check from some tabloid where they JUST
MAKE THINGS UP(!) and then the check bounces--did I mention that the dog was
married, and yet he betrayed his vows? The scales have fallen from my eyes,
boy: All those networks care about is ratings. Bastards.
Li'l Miss
Answer
John and Patsy Ramsey
are writing a book about the unsolved slaying of their 6-year-old daughter,
JonBenet. It will not be available in a boxed set with O.J. Simpson's I'm
This Close To Nailing the Real Killer , a book he did not write. Thomas
Nelson specializes in books with religious themes, although it occasionally
publishes a dubious self-serving version of public events or maybe a
cookbook.
Action Extra
Which of the following
is a line of description from the current Toys "R" Us catalog, and which is
from the Good Vibrations catalog of adult erotic toys?
Catalog Copy
"Reinvented for more wild stunts! Super action, two sided"
"Awesome action and realistic sound effects"
"Quasar Launcher or Magna Blaster, both with transforming action"
"Passing, crashing, and pit stop action"
"The ultimate in pod racing action!"
"Get ready for a crazy ride inside this inflatable toy"
"Off-the-rope action"
Products
All are from the Toys "R" Us catalog.
Tyco 7.2V Radio-Control TMH Super Rebound, $55.99--its best-selling
radio-control model car
Echo Toys Fast Lane Attack Force, $32.99--toy helicopter, toy tank.
Bandai Lost Galaxy Weapons, $21.99--cool space guns from the Power Rangers
TV show. They fold into other shapes so they're easy to sneak into school.
Mattel Hot Wheels XV Racers NASCAR Superspeedway Race Set, $44.99--race
cars. With crashability. Look for the tiny "Marlboro" sticker on each car. (I'm
not saying you'll find it, but look.)
Hasbro Micro Machines Deluxe Pod Racing Playset, $33.99--some kind of race
car toy with a Star Wars tie-in.
Moose Mountain Teeter Totter Ball Maze, $21.99--kind of an inflatable
seesaw. No use of the word "action," but it really does look like a crazy ride.
Just nuts. Pure madness, but a ride. Insane. Psycho.
Tiger Electronics WCW Nitro Hand-Held Games, $4.99--electronic wrestling
game.
