No. 340: "Say What?"
It's a common
expression, says Mahmoud el-Azzazzay, a Queens travel agent: "We say it
probably 200 or more times a day." What expression?
Send
your answer by 5 p.m. ET Sunday to [email protected] .
Wednesday's Question
(No. 339)--"Bird in Hand":
On Nov. 6 in New Jersey, volunteers opened crates and pulled out
pheasants, then, holding them by the legs, spun the birds around to make them
dizzy; this is one feature of a program whose uneasy combination of private and
state funding is drawing increasing criticism nationwide. What is the program
called?
"The
Beta Kappa Phi-Audubon Society's new public access show, Dude, Let's
Birdwatch! "-- Colleen Werthmann
"Is
this the program where Pete Singer comes down from Princeton and selects which
dizzy pheasant dies?"-- Michael Doyle ( David Rothschild had a
similar answer.)
"Robert Byrd Can Appropriate Money for Anything He Damn Well Pleases
Game-Swingin' Day."-- Matt Heimer
"I'm
not sure, but I think it's safe to assume that Charlton Heston's for it, Paul
McCartney's against, and Pamela Anderson … well, she has some very large
breasts."-- Peter Carlin
"We
call it, 'I Remember Papa.' Ah, and I do, I remember very well. Hemingway and I
would carry the crates. Papa, he was a big man, and I not so large, so I would
curse and sweat in the tropical island heat, and Papa would laugh and stop from
time to time to pull at his brown bottle. Then we would open the crates and
remove the birds and begin the flingando. Perhaps you have seen this,
señor ? We spin the birds around and around, then release them. Papa
believed that in their confused flight you could see the hand of God. He was a
very spiritual man, señor . Some of the birds, however, would just fly
straight up and dive down into the ground, embedding their beaks like the Daffy
Duck of the gringo cartoon features. Then we would laugh and laugh and laugh,
until he passed out, and I would steal his wallet."-- Floyd Elliot
Click
for more answers.
Randy's Wrap-Up
The language is
lackluster, the pacing leaden, the clichés plentiful, and the surprises
few--no, not the campaign speeches for the Iowa caucuses (Well, yes, but I'm
thinking of something else here.)--Ric Burns' 125-hour documentary series,
New York . There were a few engaging features--the astonishing
photographs, Robert Caro talking about Al Smith, John Tierney arguing that the
workers at the Triangle shirtwaist factory could have just gotten other jobs
instead of catching fire; they were only calling attention to themselves. (OK,
that was in the Times the next day, not actually a part of the series,
and I may oversimplify.) One other illuminating sequence--Burns' presentation
of Jefferson's and Hamilton's clashing ideas of America. Hamilton championed
the mercantile and the urban, what would one day be the New York City we know.
Jefferson favored the rural, a nation of imaginary yeoman farmers who would
eventually twirl pheasants in New Jersey. You can catch the final nine hours
this evening.
Protestants at Play
Answer
Take a Kid Pheasant Hunting Day
This annual event run by the New Jersey Division of
Fish, Game, and Wildlife is partly financed by the National Rifle Association
Foundation. The state supplies wardens and land; the foundation pays for birds
and ammo; volunteers from New Jersey gun clubs supply dogs and doughnuts. To
eat. Nobody is shooting doughnuts.
The birds are swung around so they're too dizzy to
fly away and will stay in the grass until the dogs can flush them out for the
kids to shoot. The pheasants. Not the doughnuts.
In his welcoming remarks to the youngsters, the
state's hunter education administrator, Patrick Carr, said: "Don't shoot a bird
on the ground; don't shoot cripples. The dogs will get them. Have a fun day,
but be safe and responsible." A life lesson for us all from a respected role
model.
Carr explained that farm-bred dizzy pheasants mean
more kids get to kill a bird. "We can't pull the trigger for them, but we can
certainly put a bird out in front of them."
Best line from Andrew
Revkin's New York Times coverage of the event: "During a break, the
children rested on the grass, their guns around them, drinking from cartons of
fruit punch and talking about Harry Potter."
Death Method
Extra
"It's legal, it works and we fully support it. We
believe it is a quick and humane way," says Lucia Ross on behalf of her boss,
Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, a big fan of the electric chair. Sure, now and then
someone catches fire, and there was a lot of blood running down a guy's
shirt--"A nosebleed!" chuckled J.B. In October, the U.S. Supreme Court agreed
to decide if the electric chair constitutes cruel and unusual punishment.
But no matter the
outcome of that case, Jeb Bush has options. It's not as if there aren't lots
ways for the states to kill poor black people. Below, I give the method of
execution; you name the state that employs it.
Methods
1. Electrocution
2. Hanging
3. Firing Squad
4. Public Stoning (all stadium seating)
5. Lethal Injection
6. Poison Gas
7. Sit and Watch Daytime
TV and Eat Tasteless Food All Day Until You Just Waste Away
Answers
1. Florida, Virginia, Georgia, Louisiana, and
Alabama.
(Hence the good-natured nickname, "southern fried." I believe it is Gov.
Bush who is good-natured; the condemned who are so darn gloomy. And
incidentally, wouldn't Ross' comments about the chair apply to Burger
King?)
2. Washington and Delaware.
3. Utah.
4. It's a Taliban thing. You know, barbaric. Not
like our space-age methods.
5. Texas, Virginia, Missouri, Arizona, and
Arkansas.
6. Mississippi, California, Arizona, North
Carolina, and Nevada.
7. Trick question. It's
just the Medicaid nursing home where we dumped my Uncle Milt.
Common
Denominator
Pheasants/peasants.
